Funny statements my preschooler has said, that sends us for a great laugh!

I'm just gonna list some of the things she has said that will forever give me a laugh when I think of them.

• She was on the toilet one night and looked up at me and said "Mom, sometimes I have to make a mad face to get it out"
• We were in the car driving to dinner and she thought daddy needed a new friend, so she pointed to a house along the way and told him she thought another daddy lived there and that he could go be friends with him and do daddy stuff.
• My husband was on the way out the door to work and my daughter said good bye and added " say hi to all your friends and remember if you get hungry, eat your beagles" She meant bugles the snack, (he had packed his lunch)
• " Mom, does santa have a pool?"
• She got a bike helmet this summer and for some reason it ended up in her room and she decided to wear it for the day. When I asked her why, this is what she said. " Well, I might bonk my head, so i should keep it on" Later she couldn't get it off by herself and got scared of it, now she won't wear it.
• She loves her blanky so much that she always wants to take it somewhere. I told her about the "blanky fairie" and that when she turns four the blakey fairie might have to come get her blanky. She was mad and thought about it for a while. Then she asked me over and over where this fairie lived and how far away she was. I asked her why she needed to know where she lived and Emma said " So I can punch her!"
• She attends dance class once a week and this year in the holiday parade her and her classmates were snowmen made out of stuffed trash bags. On the way home from the parade she says " Mom next year I want to be a princess in the parade, not a snowman trash bag"
• Again we were in the car, with no music on this time, Emma asked " do you want to hear music? I said no, she said "then I will sing"
• At preschool she had a little thanksgiving dinner and they went around the table and said what they were thankful for, of course Emma said her blanky.
• we were in line at wal mart the other day and the lady in front of us name was the same as mine. Emma was all offended and I told her that there are other people with the same names and when she gets older she will find another Emma too sometime. I also said how when i was in school there was another amber. Emma's response "gasp...what did you do!? did you play with her!
• Emma found a pet ladybug in the house and named it butter, told it that it was the best bug in the world and asked me if she could keep it forever because its so cute!
• Mommy: "emma, i think you gave daddy your cold" emma: "well i didnt want it anymore"
• Emma needed a mop bucket for preschool, they use this instead of a backpack. we couldn't find one at the dollar store and when searching for one in wal mart Emma said " (gasp), there a no buckets in this whole world!!"
• She was trying on a flowergirl dress to be in her aunts wedding and shook her head and said "This just isn't working for me."
• " Mom what are you going to be when you grow up?"
• She was doing my hair and her daddy commented that I looked a bit like a porcupine. She replied, "no, she doesn't look like a pinecone!"
• I was singing the Christmas song that goes, "Do you hear what I hear..." and she says "What is it MOM!"
• It was time for bed and she was refusing bedtime of course, she says "but I don't have a yawn yet!"

One of her most recent adventures included her brother Owen. Now I think this one is hilarious. I didn't witness this, but my husband did and explained it to me a day later. Emma is constantly getting into the fridge for a drink or snack and whenever you open anything, cupboard, door, drawer, dishwasher, Owen (her little brother of 8 mos) will run to it in his walker and attempt to get something out of it. This time Emma was in the fridge was no different for Mr. Owen and he ran to the fridge and picked up the Worcestershire sauce and wanted to treat this like one of his milk bottles!! YIKES! Meanwhile Emma has no idea and is still trying to get whatever it is she is looking for. My husband was thankfully nearby to rectify the situation! For future precaution, I have emptied the half of the inside refrigerator door in order to prevent another incident like this one.

This past summer, we bought Emma a glue stick for craft projects and she was a bit overzealous one evening with her glue and somehow got glue on her leg under her pajama pants. This glue dried overnight while she was asleep and in the morning she about had a fit when she realized she had glued a portion of her pants to her leg!! We had to have an emergency bath before breakfast in order to set her free. It came right off with warm water, but to this day she is afraid of it happening again and wont even leave a sticker on her hand for too long, and insists on washing her hands in mid crafts to get any glue off.

There have been many times where I have left the room for a minute only to come back and find that she has made a plate for herself of any random condiment such as mayo, jelly katsup, bbq sauce or ranch dressing.

For now this is all that I can remember but I will continue to post more funny statements, pictures and events of my little comedian. In the mean time, if you know me and my kids and remember something funny they did that I don't please post it in the comments or send me a message and I will put it in. And if you would like to add those funny things your kids do, post it or e mail me and I will start a section of silly things other kids do. Thanks and hope you get some good laughs.

NEW ONES!!!!

• In the car on the way home from her dance class it was very quiet, which if you know my daughter, she is never quiet. LOL I asked her if she was tired and she responded " sigh..... I need my boogers picked"
• We were in the dr. office for a check up and she patted her brother's head and asked " is his brain up there?" to which I explained we all have brains in our heads. She then proceeded to ask about whether or not birds, cats, dogs etc. have their brains in their heads too.
• This morning my daughter went into the bathroom and found the seat up. Which, to my husbands credit, rarely happens but this morning it did. Anyway this sparked a question of why daddy uses the toilet differently. As a mom I thought I had already covered the girls and boys have different parts subject. Especially since she has a soon to be one year old brother. Well I stand corrected because when I reminded her that all boys have "sprayers" (this is what she calls boy parts) she quickly stated " You didnt tell me daddy had a sprayer?! " She then asks "Is daddy's sprayer big? do you have a sprayer too? did I have a sprayer when I was a baby?" After much clarification on my part and her's she understands the nature of things and it seems that she had thought only her brother had a "sprayer". Now when her daddy came home, he recieved the question "Why didnt you tell me you had a sprayer?" And I rolled with laughter all over again.
• This one again involves my poor husband.  It was his birthday not too long ago and the day of his birthday she asks me " Is daddy gonna put on his birthday suit today?"
• We had a surprise for her when moving into a new house and she wanted to know very badly what it was.  We told her she would have to be good and wait.  She than said, "oh, I guess if you tell me what it is it would be just a plain old thing?"
• We trying to find our way around various one way streets in a new town and attempting to get into a parking space.  After about 20 mins of looking Emma says "this is ridicalus!" she meant rediculous, but it came out so serious and cute, and fit the moment well that my sister and I who were in the car with her at the time busted out into laughter.